JOY in relationships!
This week’s devotions are based on Week 9 of the Series Ephesians: Becoming Who You Are (CLICK HERE)
Have you noticed a theme in all the discussions about relationships and how a Christian is to engage in them? Marriage…parenting…employment? Perhaps as we engage in these relationships, we know that each one of them can be great or horrible depending on the day. Our marriage can be super one day and on the rocks the next. Our relationship with our children can be great one day and worst enemies the next. One Monday morning at work can set a tone for a great week or one interaction can leave you wishing for the weekend.
Relationships are challenging (Next week we will see the spiritual battle that often ensues in our relationships). But do we need hundreds of books to help us sort out the complexity of relationships? Maybe some are helpful, but let me end the week with a simple acronym that maybe many of you have heard before…but let’s apply it to relationships:
J.O.Y.
Jesus
Others
Yourself
All of the relationships we’ve looked at this week start with one premise: I won’t understand the earthly relationship until I understand my relationship with Jesus. The fact of grace that God, in his love, connected you to Christ by faith is the most profound relationship that any human being can experience. In the context of that relationship, I grow to realize how much God loves me, how much he sacrificed for me, how much he desires to grow me, and how in love he leads me. Every other relationship stems first from our relationship with Jesus, or better said, his relationship with us.
The Apostle John said, “We love because he first loved us.” How true is that! How can I love my wife as Christ loved the Church if I have no connection to the love of Christ? How can a wife submit to her husband when she is not part of the Church? How can I parent my child to walk in the ways and word of the Lord if I myself am not hearing from my Savior in his word. How can I work with all my abilities if I first don’t understand who gave me those abilities or how can I lead in the work place if I first don’t recognize the leadership of Christ in my own life.
Only with Jesus first can I be a blessing to Others.
Paul says in Ephesians 5:21 “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” The ability to yield my will to another only comes when I do it to glorify Christ, not myself. My natural inclination in relationships is to get as much as I can for myself out of them. Not so for the CHristian. The blessing of relationships is to realize they are gifts from God and opportunities for me to glorify my Savior who brought me into relationship with him.
But the amazing thing is Jesus does not leave us personally without blessing and benefit from godly relationships. As you’ve been able to honor Christ in your marriage, is it not true that you have been blessed by that? Do you not enjoy the peace, the mutual service, the support and love that your spouse gives as they reciprocate the love Christ has shown to them? Is not parenting more of a reward when you see the Spirit of God work in the lives of your children because you have taken time to train them in the ways of the Lord. Does not work become more of a blessing for you when you spend your day first and foremost serving the Lord?
When God designs something it is not to cause chaos and heartache, but rather to give us peace and joy in the relationships into which he has placed us. So as you head through your day and into the days ahead, approach every relationship with J.O.Y. – Jesus first…then Others…then yourself.
Apply: What is one thing you can do in your relationships to better model JOY in them?
Prayer: Lord Jesus, thank you for putting me first in your life of sacrifice and love. Lead me in all my relationships simply to model the love you shown me. AMEN.
Work for the Lord…not your boss!
This week’s devotions are based on Week 9 of the Series Ephesians: Becoming Who You Are (CLICK HERE)
Chances are many of you who are reading this are off to work this morning. Perhaps for some, you really enjoy your work and can’t wait to get at it every morning. For others, you may be dreading your day and maybe others are counting down the days to retirement. Sometimes work can be seen as a “necessary evil” to provide an income to allow for paying for things of life for you and your family.
Work is not always easy. Personalities rub you the wrong way. Hours can get long. Work seems unfulfilling at times. Office culture is draining. Perhaps we wish we didn’t have to work.
Today is a good time to allow God to speak into the reality of work in our lives. Like with many blessings the Lord gives, sin can mess up the blessing and make it drudgery. So what’s the answer?
Paul speaks to slaves. Slavery was part of the social structure in his day and while some slavery perhaps was similar to American slavery, slaves also could be in that condition because of debt, enemies of the country, or other reasons. Paul is not speaking to the morality of slavery, but rather encouraging slaves in their status. The direction he gives them helps to guide us as employees. Here’s what Paul gives in Ephesians 6:5 Slaves, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ. 6 Obey them not only to win their favor when their eye is on you, but like slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from your heart. 7 Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not men, 8 because you know that the Lord will reward everyone for whatever good he does, whether he is slave or free.
The reminder Paul gives is that a slave is first serving the Lord, then his master. The same is true whatever work you have to do today. You are first serving the Lord, then the company or people you work for. So here’s a few summary points as you show up for work today:
- Work hard throughout your day…you are serving the Lord
- You may like or not like your boss…but work with sincerity of heart as you would if Christ were your boss.
- Don’t just work hard when your boss is watching, but do your best at all times with a heart that desires to honor the Lord through your work.
- If your supervisor doesn’t always notice or reward you for your hard work, it’s ok, the Lord will reward you for the good work you do!
If you are in the position of leadership, take these words to heart: Ephesians 6:9 And masters, treat your slaves in the same way. Do not threaten them, since you know that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no favoritism with him. Be Christ to those you lead. Treat those you lead with love and respect as Christ has treated you!
So whatever work you have to do today, tackle it with joy and enthusiasm as it is an opportunity for you to serve the Lord and be a blessing to the people around you as you do!
Apply: What can you do differently today at work to shift your mindset and heart to work for the Lord instead of just working for your company?
Prayer: Lord, thank you for the gift of work. May I show up today and give my best simply to reflect you in my workplace! AMEN
Children obey…Parents parent!
This week’s devotions are based on Week 9 of the Series Ephesians: Becoming Who You Are (CLICK HERE)
Ephesians 6:1-3 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— 3 “that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”
I am not sure how many children read this devotion, but there are some thoughts here for parents as well. When Martin Luther penned an explanation to this command he said, “We should fear and love God so that we do not despise or anger our parents and other authorities, but honor them, serve and obey them, love and cherish them.”
For sure the first relationship that God is speaking into is the child to their parents. God has set up the social structure of the family so that children ideally have a mother and a father who love them and are willing to train and guide them in the ways of the Lord. The developing mind of a child needs the adult mind of a parent to guide their thoughts, direct their action, and be used by God to mold their children into the ways of the Lord. Perhaps this is not the woke thinking of today that believes a child should fill the blank slate of their mind in whatever they think is best. That parents are just providers of what is needed to sustain physical life and should leave the emotional, relational and spiritual development up to the child to chart their ways. Perhaps this command has almost been reversed in some instances so that it might read, “Parents, honor your children. Parents, obey your children.”
To be sure there have been parents who have shirked their responsibility to love and care for their children and abused and horribly neglected their duties. For this we are saddened of the impact on the hearts and lives of the children.
But that doesn’t make the need for God’s direction to children and parents to change. In fact, it highlights the need for godly parents to provide a godly environment of care and leadership for their children. Satan loves to work on the minds of malleable children. Without the care of a loving parent, the lies and deceit of Satan can fill the mind and heart of a child. Secularism, humanism, atheism, genderism, and much more are being communicated in the halls of education, the screens of cell phones, and the airwaves of Netflix. So the input of a parent who trains in the love and ways of the Lord is one which creates an environment where obedience is engendered and expected. Because for the child, we ultimately desire that they follow their Savior, not just have good behavior. Paul writes in Ephesians 6:4 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
Just like the husband-wife relationship is dependent on both walking with the Lord, so a godly home and parenting is dependent on parents walking with the Lord and leading their children to do the same. Parenting is not just providing a roof and three meals, but it is providing the boundaries of God’s love and law and taking time to guide your child to know and love and follow their Savior.
So kids, see your parents as they are, a gift from God to give you guidance in life.
Parents, see your children as they are, a precious gift from God to guide in the path of eternal life.
Kids, you have God’s forgiveness when you fail to obey.
Parents, you have God’s forgiveness when you fail to parent in a godly way.
Kids, you have God’s Spirit to guide and mold your heart in God’s love and grace.
Parents, you have God’s Spirit to guide and mold your heart in God’s love and grace.
So, children, obey your parents in the Lord for this is right. Parents, train your children in the ways of the Lord, for this is right.
God bless today as you live for him!
Apply: What is one thing you can do today as a parent or child to bring your family closer to Jesus?
Prayer: Lord, thank you for our families. Forgive our failings. Strengthen us in our resolve to walk more closely with you each day, AMEN.
Wives…be the Church to your husbands!
This week’s devotions are based on Week 9 of the Series Ephesians: Becoming Who You Are (CLICK HERE)
We can never underestimate the importance of having the Lord as the focus of our hearts and lives to make marriage work. To be sure, the world around presents us with many mindsets and ideas of what marriage should be, how men should be, how women should be. TikTok and Facebook Reels present snapshots into the common missteps of marriage or the quick hacks to a better marriage (some are valuable and practical). Yet in addition to the threats from outside, is the greatest threat to our marriages…our sinful nature inside. Our sinful nature naturally rebels against anything that God suggests and desires the opposite. On the other hand our nature driven by God’s Spirit craves the guidance of God for all things – including our marriages. (Maybe it’s telling that the end of Ephesians is the discussion of spiritual warfare…because the key to winning at marriage is winning the spiritual battles within your own heart.)
So the Lord gives his guidance to wives:
Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
What is helpful in these verses (as they are to husbands) is the analogy of marriage to Christ and the Church. The Church consists of Christ who unconditionally sacrificed himself for the Church and the Church who, in response, willingly follows the headship of Christ.
Anything less than this being reflected in our marriages is evidence that sin is creeping in.
For ladies, it is easy to bristle at the word “submit.” It conjures up a “slave/master” relationship where submission is demanded and expected “in everything.” Husbands can be guilty of promoting this idea with forgetting the direction the Lord gave them and simply claiming “headship” over their wives without any thought of being Christ to their wives. For this husbands need a call to repentance.
The Church willingly yields to Christ because it knows and trusts that Christ has their best interest in mind. They have witnessed the selfless, sacrificial love that Christ has shown and trust fully that the path of following Christ is the blessed path to live. They know that in all things Christ will not steer them wrong, take advantage of them, or make a decision that will harm them. In all things the Church trusts Christ to lead well and love well.
Wives carry the same spirit with your husbands. (Husbands, I can’t stay away from our responsibility to create this environment that submission is freely given because we are doing our best with the Lord’s help to lead well and love well.)
As we all know sin messes this up. Sin can lead wives to be punitive and disrespectful to their husbands. Sin can lead wives to diminish the roll God gave their husband and have a view of them that is less than honoring and fails to build up and encourage their husband in their walk of faith. Sin can lead husbands to abuse the headship God has given and force submission. They can lead in a selfish way that does not engender trust and good will from their wives. For sin as it has crept into our marriages, let us seek forgiveness from our spouse and strength from God’s Spirit to better understand his love for us so we can give that love to each other.
Marriage is a blessing from God. So let’s seek his wisdom, guidance and direction to make our marriage one that is honoring to him and a blessing to each other. And for those that are not married yet, pray for God to send you a spouse that walks with Jesus and seeks to honor him in life and in marriage.
Apply: Wives, what is one thing you can do today for your husband that will encourage him in his leading of your household in a godly way? What is something that needs repentance and forgiveness? Perhaps its time for a recommitment as a couple to seek the Lord in your marriage and walk with him.
Prayer: Lord, infiltrate all marriages with your love and grace. Help husbands to love as you loved and wives to submit to and respect their husbands as the Church submits and respects you as its head. AMEN.
Husbands…Love as Christ loved!
This week’s devotions are based on Week 9 of the Series Ephesians: Becoming Who You Are (CLICK HERE)
Every day we interact with someone. Perhaps those are passing “hello’s” in the store, but many of our interactions are with people that are part of our family or people at work. In the world around us, their is great strain on marriages and families, employers and employees. All too often, these relationships break and divorce happens, children cut off communication with their families, and workers leave their jobs.
Our section of Ephesians this week can come across as a “quick fix” for our relationships. In some ways it is. But at the heart of our relationships must be our genuine effort to reflect Christ in all of them. Why? Because Satan and our sinful nature are working overtime to engage in these relationships in a selfish way which leads to the design of God to be twisted, corrupted and ultimately broken. Especially in our culture today, we need God’s people to grow in Christ and the ability to reflect Christ in their relationships.
Let’s start with marriage.
Here’s what Paul says in Ephesians 5:22-33:
22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Our culture bristles at the word “submit”…so let’s leave that until tomorrow. While Paul addresses women first, I want to speak to husbands first (or guys who are preparing themselves to be a great husband). Every husband must prioritize growing in their relationship with Christ. Better than he knows his wife, a husband should know the Lord. Guys, let me encourage us (I will include myself), the best way we can provide for our wives is to invest in our time with the Lord. Why is that? Because Christ’s love for us is our model in loving our wives. Satan loves to twist this precious role God has given to us into a power trip where one can feel “entitled” to demand the following and service of their wives. Satan loves to get me to believe that I am in a marriage to be served by my wife (no wonder the word “submit” gets a bad wrap – because we are guilty of making it that). However, every husband must take a step back and ask, “How did Christ love me? When I answer, I discover two things:
- He gave all of himself up for me…he was willing to sacrifice!
- He put my interests above his own…he was willing to be selfless (not selfish).
So, what is our calling? Love your wives as Christ loved the church…JUST as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. Christ’s goal was to make his church a beautiful bride. His heart’s desire was the beauty and perfection of his church. So it is our wonderful blessing to reflect Christ to our wives so that as much as possible they see the love of their Savior exuding through us to them.
By the way…let me know how your marriage is when you embrace time with your Savior and being intentional in expressing his love to your wife!
Apply: Husbands, what is one thing you can do today to strengthen your relationship with Christ? What is one way you can show a sacrificial, selfless, Christ-like love to your wife?
Prayer: Lord, thank you for your great love for all of us, but especially us who have the privilege of being a husband. Forgive us for our failures to reflect you and lead us to prioritize our relationship with you so we can better love our wives just as you have loved us! AMEN.